The moment of truth for a narcissist
There is a point at which a narcissist can feel the truth gaining momentum over their falsehoods. It catches them off guard. They feel it in your silence, in your withdrawal, in your eyes that are no longer sparkling when they speak. And that is when the panic sets in, not the kind that brings tears or regret, but the kind that drives a desperate performance. They know you’re slipping through their fingers, and worse, you’re taking the truth with you. So what do they do?
They try everything, even the most absurd, theatrical, manipulative things, anything that might win them another day, another hour, another illusion of control. These are not typical behaviors; these are acts of ego survival, not survival of the soul, but of the ego. And the closer they are to getting caught, the more pitiful and desperate these acts will be. These are the three most revealing things a narcissist will do when they know that the mask will be pulled off.
Number 1. Becoming friends with your enemies, a personal experience
This one is personal and unpleasant. When I finally went no-contact with my grandiose narcissistic roommate, I believed the worst was over. I had moved on. I had walked away. I was finally breathing. I was enveloped in new energy, new individuals I trusted, and a room, a new space that felt secure. But I did not see what he had been up to behind the scenes. Three months in, I had a new flatmate and a friend we had in common sit down and inform me about something which to this day sends the shudders through my body. He told me, “He, the narcissist, has texted me each day since you went away, urging me to move rooms, to split us up, to make sure you’re driven out.”
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